Total Perspective Vortex
What really happened to Trillian? Theories abound, but you can see what she's really been up to on this blog. If you're looking for white mice, depressed robots, or the occasional Pan Galactic Gargleblaster you might be better served here:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/hitchhikers/guide/.

Otherwise, hello, and welcome.
Mail Trillian here<





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Women, The Internet and You: Tips for Men Who Use Online Dating Sites
Part I, Your Profile and Email

Part II, Selecting a Potential Date

Part III, Your First Date!

Part IV, After the First Date. Now What?


"50 First Dates"






Don't just sit there angry and ranting, do something constructive.
In the words of Patti Smith (all hail Sister Patti): People have the power.
Contact your elected officials.

Don't be passive = get involved = make a difference.
Find Federal Officials
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or Search by State

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Contact The Media
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Words are cool.
The English language is complex, stupid, illogical, confounding, brilliant, beautiful, and fascinating.
Every now and then a word presents itself that typifies all the maddeningly gorgeousness of language. They're the words that give you pause for thought. "Who came up with that word? That's an interesting string of letters." Their beauty doesn't lie in their definition (although that can play a role). It's also not in their onomatopoeia, though that, too, can play a role. Their beauty is in the way their letters combine - the visual poetry of words - and/or the way they sound when spoken. We talk a lot about music we like to hear and art we like to see, so let's all hail the unsung heroes of communication, poetry and life: Words.
Here are some I like. (Not because of their definition.)

Quasar
Hyperbole
Amenable
Taciturn
Ennui
Prophetic
Tawdry
Hubris
Ethereal
Syzygy
Umbrageous
Twerp
Sluice
Omnipotent
Sanctuary
Malevolent
Maelstrom
Luddite
Subterfuge
Akimbo
Hoosegow
Dodecahedron
Visceral
Soupçon
Truculent
Vitriol
Mercurial
Kerfuffle
Sangfroid




























 







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Highlights from the Archives. Some favorite Trillian moments.

Void, Of Course: Eliminating Expectations and Emotions for a Better Way of Life

200i: iPodyssey

Macs Are from Venus, Windows is from Mars Can a relationship survive across platform barriers?
Jerking Off

Get A Job

Office Church Ladies: A Fieldguide

'Cause I'm a Blonde

True? Honestly? I think not.

A Good Day AND Funyuns?

The Easter Boy

Relationship in the Dumpster

Wedding Dress 4 Sale, Never Worn

Got Friends? Are You Sure? Take This Test

What About Class? Take This Test

A Long Time Ago, in a Galaxy Far Far Away, There Was a Really Bad Movie

May Your Alchemical Process be Complete. Rob Roy Recipe

Good Thing She's Not in a Good Mood Very Often (We Knew it Wouldn't Last)

What Do I Have to Do to Put You in this Car Today?

Of Mice and Me (Killer Cat Strikes in Local Woman's Apartment)

Trillian: The Musical (The Holiday Special)

LA Woman (I Love (Hate) LA)

It is my Cultureth
...and it would suit-eth me kindly to speak-eth in such mannered tongue

Slanglish

It's a Little Bit Me, It's a Little Bit You
Blogging a Legacy for Future Generations


Parents Visiting? Use Trillian's Mantra!

Ghosts of Christmas Past: Mod Hair Ken

Caught Blogging by Mom, Boss or Other

2003 Holiday Sho-Lo/Mullet Awards

Crullers, The Beer Store and Other Saintly Places

Come on Out of that Doghouse! It's a Sunshine Day!

"...I had no idea our CEO is actually Paula Abdul in disguise."

Lap Dance of the Cripple

Of Muppets and American Idols
"I said happier place, not crappier place!"

Finally Off Crutches, Trillian is Emancipated

Payless? Trillian? Shoe Confessions

Reality Wednesday: Extremely Local Pub

Reality Wednesday: Backstage Staging Zone (The Sweater Blog)

The Night Secret Agent Man Shot My Dad

To Dream the Impossible Dream: The Office Karaoke Party

Trillian Flies Economy Class (Prisoner, Cell Block H)

Trillian Visits the Village of the Damned, Takes Drugs, Becomes Delusional and Blogs Her Brains Out

Trillian's Parents are Powerless

Striptease for Spiders: A PETA Charity Event (People for the Ethical Treatment of Arachnids)

What's Up with Trillian and the Richard Branson Worship?

"Screw the French and their politics, give me their cheese!"


















 
Mail Trillian here





Trillian's Guide to the Galaxy gives 5 stars to these places in the Universe:
So much more than fun with fonts, this is a daily dose of visual poetry set against a backdrop of historical trivia. (C'mon, how can you not love a site that notes Wolfman Jack's birthday?!)

CellStories

Alliance for the Great Lakes


Hot, so cool, so cool we're hot.

Ig Nobel Awards

And you think YOU have the worst bridesmaid dress?

Coolest Jewelry in the Universe here (trust Trillian, she knows)

Red Tango

If your boss is an idiot, click here.

Evil Cat Full of Loathing.

Wildlife Works

Detroit Cobras


The Beachwood Reporter is better than not all, but most sex.



Hey! Why not check out some great art and illustration while you're here? Please? It won't hurt and it's free.

Shag

Kii Arens

Tim Biskup

Jeff Soto

Jotto




Get Fuzzy Now!
If you're not getting fuzzy, you should be. All hail Darby Conley. Yes, he's part of the Syndicate. But he's cool.





Who or what is HWNMNBS: (He Whose Name Must Not Be Spoken) Trillian's ex-fiancé. "Issues? What issues?"







Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons License.


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Reading blogs at work? Click to escape to a suitable site!

Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Smart Girls
(A Trillian de-composition, to the tune of Mamas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys)

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains

Smart girls ain’t easy to love and they’re above playing games
And they’d rather read a book than subvert themselves
Kafka, Beethoven and foreign movies
And each night alone with her cat
And they won’t understand her and she won’t die young
She’ll probably just wither away

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains

A smart girl loves creaky old libraries and lively debates
Exploring the world and art and witty reparteé
Men who don’t know her won’t like her and those who do
Sometimes won’t know how to take her
She’s rarely wrong but in desperation will play dumb
Because men hate that she’s always right

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains





























Life(?) of Trillian
Single/Zero

 
Sunday, July 30, 2006  
Yeah, well, Life(?)'s been very ?.

Sorry folks.

Along with a ton of other crap 'o life(?) stuff my hard drive crashed.

Raining, pouring...

So.

A) Sorry if you've been waiting with rapt anticipation of some words. Here are some which sum up the past few weeks: Everything and nothing.

B) If you've sent an email and I haven't responded, I'm not being a horrible bitch. Really. When I finally got back online long enough to really do a good email check, including bulk folders I discovered a ton of email from non-spam, non-bulk people. I am really sorry about this. I will respond to you as soon as I can, I'm working my way through it. I still don't have a fully functioning computer at home so my online time is limited at work (oh! work! big stuff happening there, too! potentially good stuff! right now it's pain in the rear end stuff because of a ton of meetings but for the first time in years there's a slight sliver of optimism regarding management above me. I know better than to tempt fate by even admitting that, so fates, go ahead, there's your challenge, your invitation to twist away and make things unfathomably worse, but for now I shall remain optimistic.) right, internet connectivity and me. Work and at sleazy internet cafés. It's not that I don't care that you care or that I'm a horrible person. I just honestly had no idea all that real mail was lurking in the bulk folder or even in my "regular" folder. Life (?), folks, life(?). At this point it's nothing shy of a bona fide miracle I haven't topped myself, and were it not for Furry Creature I dare say I would have done just that a few weeks ago.

The Furry Creature is still alive and doing quite well considering he has lymphoma. He's had one round of chemo and will start another next week. He's looking, acting and apparently feeling a bazillion times better now that he's on medication. The prognosis is 3 - 15 months. Depends on how well his blood cells respond to the chemo and how well his little organs can function with the advancing cancer. I'm going to lose him and that sucks. But. For now he's comfortable and seems like himself, eating, playing, running around and generally being the Furry Creature. I wasn't sure if I was doing the "right" thing by treating the cancer. As much as I didn't want to let go of him, I also didn't want to put him through any ordeal solely for my sake. I had concerns I was doing the wrong thing. A week after his first treatment he was back to almost his regular self and has been content and normal-ish since. He's had no side-effects from the drugs or chemo apart from obviously feeling a lot better. So now, in spite of the expense and the health risk to myself (the chemo drugs are waaaaay toxic) I think I did the right thing. He wasn't ready to go just yet. The vet assures me we'll know when he's ready, when it's time to let go. Now is not that time.

Right. Well. There you go.

Huge apologies to everyone who's written, I really am so sorry. I appreciate all the kind words and thoughts more than I can put into words. The subject lines alone are comforting and inspiring. Thank you everyone, really.

I promise ol' Trill will be back soon. I'm working on selling my soul to get my computer situation back to functional along with paying the Furry Creature's ever increasing medical bills and that's consuming a lot of my time. Selling your soul isn't as easy as they make it out to be. Kind of a bummer, that. I just assumed you signed in blood on the dotted line and then poof! Satan gets your soul and you get your mortal wishes bestowed upon you. It's actually quite a big business, this soul buying and selling, takes a lot of time and energy. Not for the weak willed, this soul selling stuff. You have to really want it.

There are loads of words and I'll be posting again soon.

But, for now, and mainly, thanks everyone.

4:30 PM

 
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