Total Perspective Vortex
What really happened to Trillian? Theories abound, but you can see what she's really been up to on this blog. If you're looking for white mice, depressed robots, or the occasional Pan Galactic Gargleblaster you might be better served here:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/hitchhikers/guide/.

Otherwise, hello, and welcome.
Mail Trillian here<





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Women, The Internet and You: Tips for Men Who Use Online Dating Sites
Part I, Your Profile and Email

Part II, Selecting a Potential Date

Part III, Your First Date!

Part IV, After the First Date. Now What?


"50 First Dates"






Don't just sit there angry and ranting, do something constructive.
In the words of Patti Smith (all hail Sister Patti): People have the power.
Contact your elected officials.

Don't be passive = get involved = make a difference.
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Words are cool.
The English language is complex, stupid, illogical, confounding, brilliant, beautiful, and fascinating.
Every now and then a word presents itself that typifies all the maddeningly gorgeousness of language. They're the words that give you pause for thought. "Who came up with that word? That's an interesting string of letters." Their beauty doesn't lie in their definition (although that can play a role). It's also not in their onomatopoeia, though that, too, can play a role. Their beauty is in the way their letters combine - the visual poetry of words - and/or the way they sound when spoken. We talk a lot about music we like to hear and art we like to see, so let's all hail the unsung heroes of communication, poetry and life: Words.
Here are some I like. (Not because of their definition.)

Quasar
Hyperbole
Amenable
Taciturn
Ennui
Prophetic
Tawdry
Hubris
Ethereal
Syzygy
Umbrageous
Twerp
Sluice
Omnipotent
Sanctuary
Malevolent
Maelstrom
Luddite
Subterfuge
Akimbo
Hoosegow
Dodecahedron
Visceral
Soupçon
Truculent
Vitriol
Mercurial
Kerfuffle
Sangfroid




























 







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Highlights from the Archives. Some favorite Trillian moments.

Void, Of Course: Eliminating Expectations and Emotions for a Better Way of Life

200i: iPodyssey

Macs Are from Venus, Windows is from Mars Can a relationship survive across platform barriers?
Jerking Off

Get A Job

Office Church Ladies: A Fieldguide

'Cause I'm a Blonde

True? Honestly? I think not.

A Good Day AND Funyuns?

The Easter Boy

Relationship in the Dumpster

Wedding Dress 4 Sale, Never Worn

Got Friends? Are You Sure? Take This Test

What About Class? Take This Test

A Long Time Ago, in a Galaxy Far Far Away, There Was a Really Bad Movie

May Your Alchemical Process be Complete. Rob Roy Recipe

Good Thing She's Not in a Good Mood Very Often (We Knew it Wouldn't Last)

What Do I Have to Do to Put You in this Car Today?

Of Mice and Me (Killer Cat Strikes in Local Woman's Apartment)

Trillian: The Musical (The Holiday Special)

LA Woman (I Love (Hate) LA)

It is my Cultureth
...and it would suit-eth me kindly to speak-eth in such mannered tongue

Slanglish

It's a Little Bit Me, It's a Little Bit You
Blogging a Legacy for Future Generations


Parents Visiting? Use Trillian's Mantra!

Ghosts of Christmas Past: Mod Hair Ken

Caught Blogging by Mom, Boss or Other

2003 Holiday Sho-Lo/Mullet Awards

Crullers, The Beer Store and Other Saintly Places

Come on Out of that Doghouse! It's a Sunshine Day!

"...I had no idea our CEO is actually Paula Abdul in disguise."

Lap Dance of the Cripple

Of Muppets and American Idols
"I said happier place, not crappier place!"

Finally Off Crutches, Trillian is Emancipated

Payless? Trillian? Shoe Confessions

Reality Wednesday: Extremely Local Pub

Reality Wednesday: Backstage Staging Zone (The Sweater Blog)

The Night Secret Agent Man Shot My Dad

To Dream the Impossible Dream: The Office Karaoke Party

Trillian Flies Economy Class (Prisoner, Cell Block H)

Trillian Visits the Village of the Damned, Takes Drugs, Becomes Delusional and Blogs Her Brains Out

Trillian's Parents are Powerless

Striptease for Spiders: A PETA Charity Event (People for the Ethical Treatment of Arachnids)

What's Up with Trillian and the Richard Branson Worship?

"Screw the French and their politics, give me their cheese!"


















 
Mail Trillian here





Trillian's Guide to the Galaxy gives 5 stars to these places in the Universe:
So much more than fun with fonts, this is a daily dose of visual poetry set against a backdrop of historical trivia. (C'mon, how can you not love a site that notes Wolfman Jack's birthday?!)

CellStories

Alliance for the Great Lakes


Hot, so cool, so cool we're hot.

Ig Nobel Awards

And you think YOU have the worst bridesmaid dress?

Coolest Jewelry in the Universe here (trust Trillian, she knows)

Red Tango

If your boss is an idiot, click here.

Evil Cat Full of Loathing.

Wildlife Works

Detroit Cobras


The Beachwood Reporter is better than not all, but most sex.



Hey! Why not check out some great art and illustration while you're here? Please? It won't hurt and it's free.

Shag

Kii Arens

Tim Biskup

Jeff Soto

Jotto




Get Fuzzy Now!
If you're not getting fuzzy, you should be. All hail Darby Conley. Yes, he's part of the Syndicate. But he's cool.





Who or what is HWNMNBS: (He Whose Name Must Not Be Spoken) Trillian's ex-fiancé. "Issues? What issues?"







Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons License.


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Reading blogs at work? Click to escape to a suitable site!

Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Smart Girls
(A Trillian de-composition, to the tune of Mamas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys)

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains

Smart girls ain’t easy to love and they’re above playing games
And they’d rather read a book than subvert themselves
Kafka, Beethoven and foreign movies
And each night alone with her cat
And they won’t understand her and she won’t die young
She’ll probably just wither away

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains

A smart girl loves creaky old libraries and lively debates
Exploring the world and art and witty reparteé
Men who don’t know her won’t like her and those who do
Sometimes won’t know how to take her
She’s rarely wrong but in desperation will play dumb
Because men hate that she’s always right

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains





























Life(?) of Trillian
Single/Zero

 
Saturday, March 29, 2008  
Apparently Earth Hour was a "success." Rock on, WWF. And no, I'm not talking about Hulkamania. WWF is a great organization that does amazing things for wildlife of the world. The scope is international. Conservation knows no political or religious boundaries. Or, well, that's the goal, anyway. So, s'all good and I was excited and into Earth Hour. I'm still not clear why Earth Hour doesn't happen on Earth Day, but hey, whatever. Conserving energy and doing something about the huge problem of climate change is good and necessary, no matter what day of the year.

I know, I know. I hear you loud and clear. I hear you saying, "Give it a rest, Trill. We do care about glaciers and polar bears and yes, we believe global warming is real, and here now and will have a negative impact on the planet and on each of us very soon. Some of us even made it through Al Gore's yawn fest of a PowerPoint. Heck, some of us even believe Al Gore invented global warming right after he invented the internet and by golly he's got the Nobel Peace Prize to prove it. So get off our backs and off your blog about it already, will ya?"

Okay. I know. You're smart and conscientious and you care and you do your part. Yay you.

Around the globe, for one hour, individuals, businesses and municipalities turned off some or all of the lights. I had dinner with some friends at a restaurant featuring a "lights out" green meal. The menu offerings were items which do not require cooking. However they did require refrigeration which is a food health and safety code, for good reason. Green and ecologically conscious is one thing, botulism is another.

And that's a good point. You don't have to live without electricity completely to play an integral role in doing something very real, very now in creating a positive impact on the climate. Just be a little more conscious of your use of electricity and conscientious in turning any power switch. There are probably some times you don't need all the lights on in the house, or times when the television is on and you're not in the room, or nights when you could make a seven veggie salad for dinner instead of using the stove, oven or microwave.

Lighting experts say it's pleasing to have "layers and levels" of light in our homes. To the HGTV uninitiated, that means having a room awash with: recessed ceiling lighting, chandeliers or pendant lighting, table lamps and even sconces in some cases. That's a lot of lighting. And yes, I get the theory and have seen the pleasing results. All on a nifty remote control/computerized system. One of my friends has a house with a light timing system which, when you hit the switch, lights your way down the hall and into the kitchen. The light travels with you, like a spotlight, as you walk down the hall. It sounds cool but in practice it's creepy. If you stop walking the lighting continues to go off and on down the hall and into the kitchen without you. Lighting systems like these are popular and to some extent energy efficient. But c'mon. My grandparents didn't have electricity in their home, the entire huge three story farmhouse had no power, and yet somehow they managed to get by without layers of lighting, and they even managed to get to the kitchen for years before the county brought power lines out to their neck of the woods and they hooked up to them.

Am I saying we should all start fumbling around in the dark or using candles to light our way at night? No. But I know there are ways we can all cut back our energy consumption. I live in a small, teeny tiny condo. I don't need a lot of lighting and I don't use a lot. But nonetheless I am vowing to have a conscientious hour (or more) of no power (apart from the fridge) every night after dark. Seems like a no brainer, right? Wellllll, maybe not as simple as it seems. No power means no computer. No charging the cell phone, laptop or iPod. No air conditioning in the summer. Are these huge sacrifices? Oh good grief, of course not. It's getting into the habit of heightened consciousness and awareness, remembering to not hit the on switch or plug in that requires the discipline. If we all take small steps we'll have a big impact. We had a big impact in Earth Hour.

But Ireland, well, Ireland. Sigh. I'm not casting aspersions. I'm just observing and reporting, sharing the AP news quote. "Ireland's more than 7,000 pubs elected not to take part — in part because of the risk that Saturday night revelers could end up smashing glasses, falling down stairs, or setting themselves on fire with candles."

And that differs from any other Saturday night in an Irish pub?

Note to Ireland's pubs: I dined in a completely candle lit restaurant which was very crowded. Libations were served. I noticed a lot of bottles of wine being consumed. And the restrooms are down a flight of stairs. I'm happy to report that even with the very large crowd and libations served, no glasses were smashed, no one fell down the stairs and shockingly, no one set themselves on fire.

And if people setting themselves alight in pubs is a problem in Ireland, well, here's a thought: What say you encourage people to stay out of pubs for an hour?

Then again, this is a country which bans smoking anywhere anyone is employed except police holding cells, prisons, college dorms, nursing homes and psychiatric hospitals. Ummm. Again. Not casting aspersions on Ireland or the Irish. But why in the name of boiled potatoes would you make special provisions in your smoking ban for clinically physically and mentally infirm people? "Gran's so physically incapable of taking care of herself we have to put her in a nursing home, but by golly she better get to smoke there. In her bed. In the nursing home." "They finally put ol' Crazy Sean away in the looney bin, about time, eh? How many houses has he burned to the ground? I lost count. But at least he can smoke in the psych hospital." Maybe reasonable logic may not apply to personal safety issues in Ireland.

So along with doing our own part, we have to compensate for Ireland who apparently can't be trusted around open flames.

It's not necessarily lights out time for me since my lighting consumption is already minimal, but it is power out time. I'm a participant and therefore guilty party of modern times. I'm on the go and my life goes with me. I use computers. Extensively. I have a cell phone. An iPod. Digital cameras. These modern conveniences all use power. So it's time I curtailed my reliance on those items. My grandparents would scoff at this. My gran would say this, exactly: "Oh for the love of Edison, girly, you'd think you were making some divine sacrifice. Get over yourself. All those newfangled gadgets of yours have clouded your perspective and judgment. If you ask me you're far too reliant on them. I managed and entire household and managed my clothing design and sewing business without any electricity, surely you can do without it for a an hour." She's right on every point and I'm setting out to do her proud by not looking at this as a sacrifice but as natural as breathing.

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11:44 PM

 
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