Total Perspective Vortex
What really happened to Trillian? Theories abound, but you can see what she's really been up to on this blog. If you're looking for white mice, depressed robots, or the occasional Pan Galactic Gargleblaster you might be better served here:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/hitchhikers/guide/.

Otherwise, hello, and welcome.
Mail Trillian here<





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Women, The Internet and You: Tips for Men Who Use Online Dating Sites
Part I, Your Profile and Email

Part II, Selecting a Potential Date

Part III, Your First Date!

Part IV, After the First Date. Now What?


"50 First Dates"






Don't just sit there angry and ranting, do something constructive.
In the words of Patti Smith (all hail Sister Patti): People have the power.
Contact your elected officials.

Don't be passive = get involved = make a difference.
Find Federal Officials
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or Search by State

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Contact The Media
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Words are cool.
The English language is complex, stupid, illogical, confounding, brilliant, beautiful, and fascinating.
Every now and then a word presents itself that typifies all the maddeningly gorgeousness of language. They're the words that give you pause for thought. "Who came up with that word? That's an interesting string of letters." Their beauty doesn't lie in their definition (although that can play a role). It's also not in their onomatopoeia, though that, too, can play a role. Their beauty is in the way their letters combine - the visual poetry of words - and/or the way they sound when spoken. We talk a lot about music we like to hear and art we like to see, so let's all hail the unsung heroes of communication, poetry and life: Words.
Here are some I like. (Not because of their definition.)

Quasar
Hyperbole
Amenable
Taciturn
Ennui
Prophetic
Tawdry
Hubris
Ethereal
Syzygy
Umbrageous
Twerp
Sluice
Omnipotent
Sanctuary
Malevolent
Maelstrom
Luddite
Subterfuge
Akimbo
Hoosegow
Dodecahedron
Visceral
Soupçon
Truculent
Vitriol
Mercurial
Kerfuffle
Sangfroid




























 







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Highlights from the Archives. Some favorite Trillian moments.

Void, Of Course: Eliminating Expectations and Emotions for a Better Way of Life

200i: iPodyssey

Macs Are from Venus, Windows is from Mars Can a relationship survive across platform barriers?
Jerking Off

Get A Job

Office Church Ladies: A Fieldguide

'Cause I'm a Blonde

True? Honestly? I think not.

A Good Day AND Funyuns?

The Easter Boy

Relationship in the Dumpster

Wedding Dress 4 Sale, Never Worn

Got Friends? Are You Sure? Take This Test

What About Class? Take This Test

A Long Time Ago, in a Galaxy Far Far Away, There Was a Really Bad Movie

May Your Alchemical Process be Complete. Rob Roy Recipe

Good Thing She's Not in a Good Mood Very Often (We Knew it Wouldn't Last)

What Do I Have to Do to Put You in this Car Today?

Of Mice and Me (Killer Cat Strikes in Local Woman's Apartment)

Trillian: The Musical (The Holiday Special)

LA Woman (I Love (Hate) LA)

It is my Cultureth
...and it would suit-eth me kindly to speak-eth in such mannered tongue

Slanglish

It's a Little Bit Me, It's a Little Bit You
Blogging a Legacy for Future Generations


Parents Visiting? Use Trillian's Mantra!

Ghosts of Christmas Past: Mod Hair Ken

Caught Blogging by Mom, Boss or Other

2003 Holiday Sho-Lo/Mullet Awards

Crullers, The Beer Store and Other Saintly Places

Come on Out of that Doghouse! It's a Sunshine Day!

"...I had no idea our CEO is actually Paula Abdul in disguise."

Lap Dance of the Cripple

Of Muppets and American Idols
"I said happier place, not crappier place!"

Finally Off Crutches, Trillian is Emancipated

Payless? Trillian? Shoe Confessions

Reality Wednesday: Extremely Local Pub

Reality Wednesday: Backstage Staging Zone (The Sweater Blog)

The Night Secret Agent Man Shot My Dad

To Dream the Impossible Dream: The Office Karaoke Party

Trillian Flies Economy Class (Prisoner, Cell Block H)

Trillian Visits the Village of the Damned, Takes Drugs, Becomes Delusional and Blogs Her Brains Out

Trillian's Parents are Powerless

Striptease for Spiders: A PETA Charity Event (People for the Ethical Treatment of Arachnids)

What's Up with Trillian and the Richard Branson Worship?

"Screw the French and their politics, give me their cheese!"


















 
Mail Trillian here





Trillian's Guide to the Galaxy gives 5 stars to these places in the Universe:
So much more than fun with fonts, this is a daily dose of visual poetry set against a backdrop of historical trivia. (C'mon, how can you not love a site that notes Wolfman Jack's birthday?!)

CellStories

Alliance for the Great Lakes


Hot, so cool, so cool we're hot.

Ig Nobel Awards

And you think YOU have the worst bridesmaid dress?

Coolest Jewelry in the Universe here (trust Trillian, she knows)

Red Tango

If your boss is an idiot, click here.

Evil Cat Full of Loathing.

Wildlife Works

Detroit Cobras


The Beachwood Reporter is better than not all, but most sex.



Hey! Why not check out some great art and illustration while you're here? Please? It won't hurt and it's free.

Shag

Kii Arens

Tim Biskup

Jeff Soto

Jotto




Get Fuzzy Now!
If you're not getting fuzzy, you should be. All hail Darby Conley. Yes, he's part of the Syndicate. But he's cool.





Who or what is HWNMNBS: (He Whose Name Must Not Be Spoken) Trillian's ex-fiancé. "Issues? What issues?"







Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons License.


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Reading blogs at work? Click to escape to a suitable site!

Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Smart Girls
(A Trillian de-composition, to the tune of Mamas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys)

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains

Smart girls ain’t easy to love and they’re above playing games
And they’d rather read a book than subvert themselves
Kafka, Beethoven and foreign movies
And each night alone with her cat
And they won’t understand her and she won’t die young
She’ll probably just wither away

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains

A smart girl loves creaky old libraries and lively debates
Exploring the world and art and witty reparteé
Men who don’t know her won’t like her and those who do
Sometimes won’t know how to take her
She’s rarely wrong but in desperation will play dumb
Because men hate that she’s always right

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains





























Life(?) of Trillian
Single/Zero

 
Wednesday, August 03, 2011  
Wow. Okay. Um. Wow.

Well then.

Apparently there are a lot of people who are a) living in isolated bubbles of prosperity, and/or b) self-righteous, pompous assholes.

Yes, I have been unemployed 2 years. That's not to say that I have worked, or spent every waking hour pursuing employment. I worked several part-time jobs, I consult/freelance, I do anything I can to earn money. But. I do not have a full time job. I have now applied to over 2,000 jobs in every range of pay, skill-level and location feasible. I am not "holding out" for my former salary or rank. Apart from jobs in the cigarette, porn and meat packing industries (yes, they are two different industries) I am not picky about where I apply/work. Yes. I have even applied at fast-food restaurants, and, yes, if there was a Wal-Mart within realistic distance I would swallow my hatred of Wal-Mart and all that it stands for and apply for a job there. (Wal-Mart, the new welfare.)

I did not qualify for the storied "99 weeks" of unemployment, so I have been without assistance of any kind for quite a while. My severance, savings, 401K and everything of any value I owned are gone. I used all of my financial resources and sold everything I could to shelter, and when I could afford it, feed myself. 

I don't do drugs, I'm not an alcoholic, I'm not lazy and I'm not uneducated or unskilled.

I do, however, fall in the 36 - 52 year-old demographic where the majority of the long-term unemployed reside. Based on my age, education and years of professional experience the odds were stacked against me from the start. Big time.

But I am resourceful and creative and reasonably intelligent and I know a lot of people and I kinda hoped I'd beat the odds. Or, well, at least take the stats that comprise the odds and use that knowledge to navigate around the odds.

But.

So far, no full-time job offer.

And I know there are millions of others exactly like me, intelligent, professional, experienced, talented, nice people who do everything humanly possible to find a full-time job and: nothing.

However, since my previous post on my rules/vows/promises to myself about unemployment, I have been inundated with h8 mail. Even more than usual.

What I don't understand is why my (or anyone else's) unemployment plight invokes such venomous hatred.

The comments are not just, "eh, shut up and get a job at Wal-Mart or McDonalds you lazy bum, you and all the other unemployed people need to get a clue and get a job." That sort of comment - while ignorant, lacking in scope and depth of the issues behind unemployment and self-righteously dismissive - is to be expected. But the email and comments I've received in the past few days are abusive, including a couple physical threats. So far 23 people have suggested I kill myself, the prevailing reasons being that I am a waste of oxygen, contribute nothing to society, I have no children or spouse and therefore: as a few email counselors reasoned, I have "no real reason to live anyway."

To all those who have suggested suicide: Thank you for your insight. I don't talk about it, I don't post it in a public forum because it's personal and I don't want people to worry about me, but for the record, yes, I do consider suicide. Daily. Every night around midnight I think, "Well, there goes another day and you're still unemployed and still alive. Do you think it's worth adding another day to this dismal slog toward death or just end it now and put yourself and everyone who knows you out of the misery of worry and stress?" I weigh the factors including if my being alive is causing more worry and stress on my family and friends than my death would. Right now my mother needs some help recovering from a health issue, so right now, the answer to my suicide question is no. But she's improving every day and when she's well enough and the answer to my nightly question is yes, I know exactly how I'll do it. I've spent over a year working out the details of a fail-proof, fool-proof personal suicide plan. This is what I do on sleepless nights. And I know many other long-term unemployed people spend their sleepless nights in the same pursuit, especially us single long-term unemployed people.

And, it might surprise those of you who suggested suicide to know that thinking about it and having a plan, knowing it's an option, provides a lot of comfort and in fact kind of cheers me up. One of the worst aspects of long-term unemployment is the loss of control. Without money I have very little control over my life. I have no money to do anything. As I said in the earlier post, it's not living, it's existing, surviving. My life consists of: Looking for a job and breathing. That's it. Occasionally my mother or a friend helps me out with a diversion, a meal out, a movie, a road trip, but me, on my own, the only thing I can afford to do is look for a job and figure out how to keep my body safe and functioning. My physical being is one of the few things I still control. If I don't find a full-time job soon, suicide will be the only thing that makes me feel empowered, and knowing that I at least have control over that gives me some confidence. I do have at least one option left.

One of my former co-workers killed herself shortly after we were laid off. I know of two other confirmed suicides as a direct result of unemployment and several failed attempts.

Okay? There you go. It's not something most people want to know. But apparently, based on the h8 mail a lot of people think that unemployed people are worthless wastes of DNA, a blight on the economy and society in general and "we" would all be better off if they all just killed themselves.

And also for the record, I do not collect welfare, food stamps or any kind of medical assistance and I did not qualify for mortgage/housing assistance. Not that I'm too proud. A friend looked into it on my behalf, and, I don't qualify. I hadn't considered it, but when she told me she made a few calls on my behalf and found out I don't qualify, the question of whether or not I am too proud to use government assistance was a non-question. (And that homeowners' assistance program was a complete and total joke, someday I'll tell you about what I went through with that nonsense. Suffice it to say, it helped almost no one, especially the unemployed.)

As for my home, the value has dropped so drastically that even if I could sell it I'd still have a 20 years of a mortgage to pay. But that's a moot point because selling it is/has been highly improbable due to the glut of condos on the market in my neighborhood. In my building alone, right now, there are five foreclosures and eight others at ridiculously low prices. Seriously, there are new Buicks that cost more than the asking price of one of the units in my building.

So, there you go. The dirty underbelly of unemployment that I prefer not to discuss. But maybe I should have been discussing it more openly. Maybe my "keeping it to myself" plan is being read as apathy, laziness and stupidity.


I'm kind of surprised the depth of emotion the long-term unemployment problem invokes. Based on my post, it causes a visceral reaction in people.

And let's be clear, I do not care what these (or other people) think. None of the people who emailed me offered any constructive insight, suggestions or ideas other than the aforementioned suicide and Wal-Mart/MacDonalds suggestions.

Let me be very clear on this, too: I am not, nor have I ever been, looking for pity. I do not, and have not, ever blamed anyone for my unemployment. I am not looking for pity or a handout, I'm looking for a job. I have always taken full responsibility for myself, my career and my life. A little compassion - some empathy - would be nice. But I don't expect it.

If you have something constructive to offer me and/or other unemployed people, then please email me, I'll take any and all bits of wisdom, advice, ideas and insight. I will pass along helpful and positive words.

And you can continue to sling your hatred at me, I'm pretty tough, thick skinned, and I can take it. But. I would ask you to ask yourself one question before lashing out at me (or anyone else): What does what I'm writing/saying accomplish? Will it help the intended target or will it help me feel better to just get this off my chest? If it's just a matter of getting if off your chest, fair enough, but that's a self-serving purpose, one which might be better served by, oh, I dunno, talking to a trained anger management counselor about the true source of your anger. You see how I did that? I offered a little insight and a constructive suggestion.

The reason I'm publicly responding to all this h8 mail is that I have concerns that if my little post that was generally positive invoked such a huge hateful response, there must be thousands (millions) of people carrying around this sort of hatred and ignorance regarding unemployed people. And that concerns me. I know I'm not the only one who considers suicide on a daily basis. So I worry that someone will spew some self-serving, self-righteous insult at an unemployed person who happens to be teetering on the edge of "yes" to their suicide plan and that self-serving remark will serve as their final proof that by default of death, today is the day that is the last day of unemployment.

Like I said, I don't expect it, but a little compassion would be nice.

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10:56 AM

 
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