Total Perspective Vortex
What really happened to Trillian? Theories abound, but you can see what she's really been up to on this blog. If you're looking for white mice, depressed robots, or the occasional Pan Galactic Gargleblaster you might be better served here:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/hitchhikers/guide/.

Otherwise, hello, and welcome.
Mail Trillian here<





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Women, The Internet and You: Tips for Men Who Use Online Dating Sites
Part I, Your Profile and Email

Part II, Selecting a Potential Date

Part III, Your First Date!

Part IV, After the First Date. Now What?


"50 First Dates"






Don't just sit there angry and ranting, do something constructive.
In the words of Patti Smith (all hail Sister Patti): People have the power.
Contact your elected officials.

Don't be passive = get involved = make a difference.
Find Federal Officials
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Words are cool.
The English language is complex, stupid, illogical, confounding, brilliant, beautiful, and fascinating.
Every now and then a word presents itself that typifies all the maddeningly gorgeousness of language. They're the words that give you pause for thought. "Who came up with that word? That's an interesting string of letters." Their beauty doesn't lie in their definition (although that can play a role). It's also not in their onomatopoeia, though that, too, can play a role. Their beauty is in the way their letters combine - the visual poetry of words - and/or the way they sound when spoken. We talk a lot about music we like to hear and art we like to see, so let's all hail the unsung heroes of communication, poetry and life: Words.
Here are some I like. (Not because of their definition.)

Quasar
Hyperbole
Amenable
Taciturn
Ennui
Prophetic
Tawdry
Hubris
Ethereal
Syzygy
Umbrageous
Twerp
Sluice
Omnipotent
Sanctuary
Malevolent
Maelstrom
Luddite
Subterfuge
Akimbo
Hoosegow
Dodecahedron
Visceral
Soupçon
Truculent
Vitriol
Mercurial
Kerfuffle
Sangfroid




























 







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Highlights from the Archives. Some favorite Trillian moments.

Void, Of Course: Eliminating Expectations and Emotions for a Better Way of Life

200i: iPodyssey

Macs Are from Venus, Windows is from Mars Can a relationship survive across platform barriers?
Jerking Off

Get A Job

Office Church Ladies: A Fieldguide

'Cause I'm a Blonde

True? Honestly? I think not.

A Good Day AND Funyuns?

The Easter Boy

Relationship in the Dumpster

Wedding Dress 4 Sale, Never Worn

Got Friends? Are You Sure? Take This Test

What About Class? Take This Test

A Long Time Ago, in a Galaxy Far Far Away, There Was a Really Bad Movie

May Your Alchemical Process be Complete. Rob Roy Recipe

Good Thing She's Not in a Good Mood Very Often (We Knew it Wouldn't Last)

What Do I Have to Do to Put You in this Car Today?

Of Mice and Me (Killer Cat Strikes in Local Woman's Apartment)

Trillian: The Musical (The Holiday Special)

LA Woman (I Love (Hate) LA)

It is my Cultureth
...and it would suit-eth me kindly to speak-eth in such mannered tongue

Slanglish

It's a Little Bit Me, It's a Little Bit You
Blogging a Legacy for Future Generations


Parents Visiting? Use Trillian's Mantra!

Ghosts of Christmas Past: Mod Hair Ken

Caught Blogging by Mom, Boss or Other

2003 Holiday Sho-Lo/Mullet Awards

Crullers, The Beer Store and Other Saintly Places

Come on Out of that Doghouse! It's a Sunshine Day!

"...I had no idea our CEO is actually Paula Abdul in disguise."

Lap Dance of the Cripple

Of Muppets and American Idols
"I said happier place, not crappier place!"

Finally Off Crutches, Trillian is Emancipated

Payless? Trillian? Shoe Confessions

Reality Wednesday: Extremely Local Pub

Reality Wednesday: Backstage Staging Zone (The Sweater Blog)

The Night Secret Agent Man Shot My Dad

To Dream the Impossible Dream: The Office Karaoke Party

Trillian Flies Economy Class (Prisoner, Cell Block H)

Trillian Visits the Village of the Damned, Takes Drugs, Becomes Delusional and Blogs Her Brains Out

Trillian's Parents are Powerless

Striptease for Spiders: A PETA Charity Event (People for the Ethical Treatment of Arachnids)

What's Up with Trillian and the Richard Branson Worship?

"Screw the French and their politics, give me their cheese!"


















 
Mail Trillian here





Trillian's Guide to the Galaxy gives 5 stars to these places in the Universe:
So much more than fun with fonts, this is a daily dose of visual poetry set against a backdrop of historical trivia. (C'mon, how can you not love a site that notes Wolfman Jack's birthday?!)

CellStories

Alliance for the Great Lakes


Hot, so cool, so cool we're hot.

Ig Nobel Awards

And you think YOU have the worst bridesmaid dress?

Coolest Jewelry in the Universe here (trust Trillian, she knows)

Red Tango

If your boss is an idiot, click here.

Evil Cat Full of Loathing.

Wildlife Works

Detroit Cobras


The Beachwood Reporter is better than not all, but most sex.



Hey! Why not check out some great art and illustration while you're here? Please? It won't hurt and it's free.

Shag

Kii Arens

Tim Biskup

Jeff Soto

Jotto




Get Fuzzy Now!
If you're not getting fuzzy, you should be. All hail Darby Conley. Yes, he's part of the Syndicate. But he's cool.





Who or what is HWNMNBS: (He Whose Name Must Not Be Spoken) Trillian's ex-fiancé. "Issues? What issues?"







Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons License.


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Reading blogs at work? Click to escape to a suitable site!

Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Smart Girls
(A Trillian de-composition, to the tune of Mamas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys)

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains

Smart girls ain’t easy to love and they’re above playing games
And they’d rather read a book than subvert themselves
Kafka, Beethoven and foreign movies
And each night alone with her cat
And they won’t understand her and she won’t die young
She’ll probably just wither away

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains

A smart girl loves creaky old libraries and lively debates
Exploring the world and art and witty reparteé
Men who don’t know her won’t like her and those who do
Sometimes won’t know how to take her
She’s rarely wrong but in desperation will play dumb
Because men hate that she’s always right

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains





























Life(?) of Trillian
Single/Zero

 
Saturday, February 02, 2008  
It's Groundhog Day. Yipppeeee!! I love Groundhog Day.

You're sitting there thinking, "Huh? I mean, I know Trill's got some funny quirks but this is kind of a weird one, even for her. And aren't there animal rights implications to Groundhog Day?"

Hear me out on this. I'm not superstitious or a farmer or whatever you'd call the whole Groundhog Day thing.

1) The groundhogs they use for the "official" proclamation are treated pretty darned well and have a better life expectancy than groundhogs living in the wild. Am I okay with "taming" and exploiting wild animals? No, not really. But. Given the choice between giving some groundhogs a really cushy comfy life v. the thousands of groundhogs who are killed in roadside accidents, well, I'd have to go with the perspective that "taming" and exploiting few is saving a few who would otherwise have a life expectancy of about 2 years at most.

2) There's one huge red downer of a non-holiday holiday that gets all the attention in February. Since February 14th is a stupid, overmarketed, depressing (to some of us) day, I love to revel in the oft overlooked non-holiday holiday in February: Groundhog Day. While people are getting all hopped up high in anticipation of Valentine's Day, I'm all hopped up high, too, but in anticipation of Groundhog Day. The disturbing and telling fact that I'm all hopped up high on a chubby rodent called upon to forecast the fate of weather while other people are hopped up high on a cute little cherub bringing romance does not escape me. Given the state of my lovelife a chubby weather predicting rodent is the most excitement I'll be getting in February.

3) I have an annual tradition on February 2.

I watch Groundhog Day. The Bill Murray movie. Sometimes I even throw a little party. This year is a party year. I'm making rodent and weather related treats. He saw his shadow this year, so I'll be making snowflake cookies and mitten shaped brownies this afternoon. There will be warm libations like peppermint schnapps in hot chocolate and hot buttered rum. I've got fuzzy socks, mittens and Chapstick® as party favors. If Phil hadn't seen his shadow I'd be whipping up sunshine cookies and flower shaped brownies, serving margaritas and Hurricanes and sending people home with beach balls, rattan beach mats and suntan lotion. Yeah, that's the down side of a Groundhog Day party, you have to be prepared for either prediction. Still, after you do a few of these parties you get the drill down to a science.

There are two types of people in this world: Those who hate Groundhog Day and those who think it's layered and brilliant. I'm in the latter group. It's one of my all time favorite movies.

Oh sure, the first time I saw it the obvious comedic aspects were great. Time passed, I got a little older, a little wiser, a little more aware and depressed about the monotony of life, feeling stuck in a place where you don't really fit in, where you're accepted on the surface levels and manage to get along, but inside you know something's wrong, something's weird, something's not right. You're not alone but you're lonely because, well, really you are alone because you can't make anyone, not even one special person understand what's happening to you. Every day feels the same, you do everything you can to change it, and yet you can't quite escape the monotony. So you try everything you can think of to deal with it. You try to mock it. You try to accept it. You try to end it. And yet, sure as I've Got You Babe is one of the all time chirpiest guilty pleasure camp songs ever recorded, you wake up the next morning and face it all over again.

The more years that pass since the first time I saw Groundhog Day, the more I identify with it. It's still funny to me, and that's the crucial aspect of the movie. It would be a horrendous downer, brilliant, but a downer, like Eternal Sunshine... And therein lies one of the great aspects of the revisions to the original screenplay and Bill Murray. This situation, real or metaphoric, sucks. Bad. It really sucks. Suicidally bad. But. If you squint hard enough at it, there is a humorous aspect to it. Schadenfreude except you're not laughing at the misfortune of others, you're laughing at your own misfortune and misery. Maybe that's not a healthy psychological technique, but, it can lighten the load enough to keep the lure of an overdose of pills and alcohol under control. So, clinically healthy or not, seeing the funny side of your own misery can save your life. Bill Murray was perfect casting for this. He's funny, but not over the top funny. He's charming, but not sugary, dull charming. He's got bite, he gets it. He can be annoying, cynically mean, and doesn't suffer fools lightly, but, he's funny. And he does have it in him to be less annoying. We know that from the get-go. We see that he's a jerk, but there's depth to him and his character, there is a possibility for redemption and maybe even salvation. And he's funny. I mean, his lines and his delivery of those lines is funny. Quietly, intelligently, darkly, deeply funny. (Yes, as we know, I'm a huge Bill Murray fan and he and I had quite a little thing going there for a while. But still. He's fantastic in this movie. Oh, and, I've decided to use blog labels where appropriate. So instead of linking to previous Bill Murray posts, if you're interested in my history with Bill Murray, you just go to the end of this post, click on the "Bill Murray" link and all my previous Bill Murray posts will magically appear before you. It's better than "search this blog" because the I've chosen which posts are relevant, whereas search will bring you every post where the words are written. In this case of Bill Murray, for instance, only the posts about Groundhog Day or my history with Bill Murray will appear when you click on the label link. If you search Bill Murray you'll get all those and other random posts where he's mentioned offhand and not really relevant. (Though you could argue in this case, given my bizarre psychology with Bill Murray, all references to Bill Murray could be relevant.) Anyway, I've jumped on the label bandwagon. I ♥ tags. I ♥ the internet. Al Gore, The Future owes you so much, things we can't even dream of right now, we owe you everything for inventing the internet.)

The end, the theme of change and redemption triumphing and love conquering all, well, yeah, I mean, that's Hollywood for you. And this isn't alternative indie theatre Eternal Sunshine..., after all. It's mainstream '90s cineplex Groundhog Day. The isolation and depression themes are pretty heavy for the cineplex, so a chirpy little ending was required to keep viewing audiences from going home, examining the drudgery of their lives and killing themselves. And I never get the impression that Bill/Phil is going to live a life of kittens and rainbows even after he wakes up on February 3rd with Andie MacDowell. He may live a life less alone and with more personal insight, but there's no indication that poof! he's now going to live every day in a high-on-life giddiness. He's elated, of course, and life will never be the same, but, let's face it, even with deeper understanding and a special someone, life is still life and we are who we are. A little less loneliness and isolation can go a long way to assuaging the pain of solitary existence, but, better than average perception of life leads to cynical insight, no matter how fulfilled you are on a personal level.

And as for the "sweet" predictable ending, well, really, even the loneliest and most cynical among us want Bill/Phil to realize he was a pompous jerk with a bad attitude about women. We want him to realize that he needed to learn a few lessons about himself, "grow as a person." We want him to want Andie MacDowell for the right reasons. And we figure, hey, if it can happen to Bill/Phil, maybe, just maybe, if we keep trying, keep growing, one day the monotony and loneliness of our own life will ease. Maybe we'll find a way to be understood and accepted, at least by one special person and then we won't feel so isolated and lonely. If Bill/Phil can learn and grow and eventually succeed and escape, albeit with a lot of trial and error, certainly we can, too.

So. Happy Groundhog Day. If you haven't seen the movie in a while, I recommend it. Give it another viewing now that you're a little older and wiser than the last time you saw it. There's a 15th anniversary DVD out this year. (I know, 15 years?!! Really??? It's been 15 years??? Crap, talk about the monotony of life dragging on and on and on...) Oh, and, on the DVD there's great commentary by Harold Ramis and the original screenplay, "The Weight of Time." (Which is more dark and plays on the themes of loneliness and isolation.)

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