Total Perspective Vortex
What really happened to Trillian? Theories abound, but you can see what she's really been up to on this blog. If you're looking for white mice, depressed robots, or the occasional Pan Galactic Gargleblaster you might be better served here:
http://www.bbc.co.uk/cult/hitchhikers/guide/.

Otherwise, hello, and welcome.
Mail Trillian here<





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Women, The Internet and You: Tips for Men Who Use Online Dating Sites
Part I, Your Profile and Email

Part II, Selecting a Potential Date

Part III, Your First Date!

Part IV, After the First Date. Now What?


"50 First Dates"






Don't just sit there angry and ranting, do something constructive.
In the words of Patti Smith (all hail Sister Patti): People have the power.
Contact your elected officials.

Don't be passive = get involved = make a difference.
Find Federal Officials
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or Search by State

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Contact The Media
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Words are cool.
The English language is complex, stupid, illogical, confounding, brilliant, beautiful, and fascinating.
Every now and then a word presents itself that typifies all the maddeningly gorgeousness of language. They're the words that give you pause for thought. "Who came up with that word? That's an interesting string of letters." Their beauty doesn't lie in their definition (although that can play a role). It's also not in their onomatopoeia, though that, too, can play a role. Their beauty is in the way their letters combine - the visual poetry of words - and/or the way they sound when spoken. We talk a lot about music we like to hear and art we like to see, so let's all hail the unsung heroes of communication, poetry and life: Words.
Here are some I like. (Not because of their definition.)

Quasar
Hyperbole
Amenable
Taciturn
Ennui
Prophetic
Tawdry
Hubris
Ethereal
Syzygy
Umbrageous
Twerp
Sluice
Omnipotent
Sanctuary
Malevolent
Maelstrom
Luddite
Subterfuge
Akimbo
Hoosegow
Dodecahedron
Visceral
Soupçon
Truculent
Vitriol
Mercurial
Kerfuffle
Sangfroid




























 







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Highlights from the Archives. Some favorite Trillian moments.

Void, Of Course: Eliminating Expectations and Emotions for a Better Way of Life

200i: iPodyssey

Macs Are from Venus, Windows is from Mars Can a relationship survive across platform barriers?
Jerking Off

Get A Job

Office Church Ladies: A Fieldguide

'Cause I'm a Blonde

True? Honestly? I think not.

A Good Day AND Funyuns?

The Easter Boy

Relationship in the Dumpster

Wedding Dress 4 Sale, Never Worn

Got Friends? Are You Sure? Take This Test

What About Class? Take This Test

A Long Time Ago, in a Galaxy Far Far Away, There Was a Really Bad Movie

May Your Alchemical Process be Complete. Rob Roy Recipe

Good Thing She's Not in a Good Mood Very Often (We Knew it Wouldn't Last)

What Do I Have to Do to Put You in this Car Today?

Of Mice and Me (Killer Cat Strikes in Local Woman's Apartment)

Trillian: The Musical (The Holiday Special)

LA Woman (I Love (Hate) LA)

It is my Cultureth
...and it would suit-eth me kindly to speak-eth in such mannered tongue

Slanglish

It's a Little Bit Me, It's a Little Bit You
Blogging a Legacy for Future Generations


Parents Visiting? Use Trillian's Mantra!

Ghosts of Christmas Past: Mod Hair Ken

Caught Blogging by Mom, Boss or Other

2003 Holiday Sho-Lo/Mullet Awards

Crullers, The Beer Store and Other Saintly Places

Come on Out of that Doghouse! It's a Sunshine Day!

"...I had no idea our CEO is actually Paula Abdul in disguise."

Lap Dance of the Cripple

Of Muppets and American Idols
"I said happier place, not crappier place!"

Finally Off Crutches, Trillian is Emancipated

Payless? Trillian? Shoe Confessions

Reality Wednesday: Extremely Local Pub

Reality Wednesday: Backstage Staging Zone (The Sweater Blog)

The Night Secret Agent Man Shot My Dad

To Dream the Impossible Dream: The Office Karaoke Party

Trillian Flies Economy Class (Prisoner, Cell Block H)

Trillian Visits the Village of the Damned, Takes Drugs, Becomes Delusional and Blogs Her Brains Out

Trillian's Parents are Powerless

Striptease for Spiders: A PETA Charity Event (People for the Ethical Treatment of Arachnids)

What's Up with Trillian and the Richard Branson Worship?

"Screw the French and their politics, give me their cheese!"


















 
Mail Trillian here





Trillian's Guide to the Galaxy gives 5 stars to these places in the Universe:
So much more than fun with fonts, this is a daily dose of visual poetry set against a backdrop of historical trivia. (C'mon, how can you not love a site that notes Wolfman Jack's birthday?!)

CellStories

Alliance for the Great Lakes


Hot, so cool, so cool we're hot.

Ig Nobel Awards

And you think YOU have the worst bridesmaid dress?

Coolest Jewelry in the Universe here (trust Trillian, she knows)

Red Tango

If your boss is an idiot, click here.

Evil Cat Full of Loathing.

Wildlife Works

Detroit Cobras


The Beachwood Reporter is better than not all, but most sex.



Hey! Why not check out some great art and illustration while you're here? Please? It won't hurt and it's free.

Shag

Kii Arens

Tim Biskup

Jeff Soto

Jotto




Get Fuzzy Now!
If you're not getting fuzzy, you should be. All hail Darby Conley. Yes, he's part of the Syndicate. But he's cool.





Who or what is HWNMNBS: (He Whose Name Must Not Be Spoken) Trillian's ex-fiancé. "Issues? What issues?"







Creative Commons License
This work is licensed under a Creative Commons License.


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Reading blogs at work? Click to escape to a suitable site!

Mamas, Don’t Let Your Babies Grow Up to be Smart Girls
(A Trillian de-composition, to the tune of Mamas, Don't Let Your Babies Grow Up to Be Cowboys)

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains

Smart girls ain’t easy to love and they’re above playing games
And they’d rather read a book than subvert themselves
Kafka, Beethoven and foreign movies
And each night alone with her cat
And they won’t understand her and she won’t die young
She’ll probably just wither away

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains

A smart girl loves creaky old libraries and lively debates
Exploring the world and art and witty reparteé
Men who don’t know her won’t like her and those who do
Sometimes won’t know how to take her
She’s rarely wrong but in desperation will play dumb
Because men hate that she’s always right

Mama don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
Don’t let them do puzzles and read lots of books
Make ‘em be strippers and dancers and such
Mamas, don’t let your babies grow up to be smart girls
They’ll never find men and they’re always alone
Even though men claim they want brains





























Life(?) of Trillian
Single/Zero

 
Monday, May 06, 2013  
Last year I interviewed for a job and did not get it (obviously). The HR person I interviewed with was one of the worst examples of HR ignorance and arrogance I have ever encountered. The HR person was young and very self-important. It was obvious the "I have a job and you don't, and I am in the position of making or breaking your opportunities for employment" aspect of the HR - candidate dynamic had gone straight to the ego. But I sucked up and played the game and got through to the second and third round of interviews, which went well.

The hiring manager (in an executive level position) was very nice, she even actually phoned me to explain the only reason they didn't select me for the position was because the other top candidate had the exact client experience in the industry of their top client. She wanted me to know that I was perfectly qualified and a great candidate and a nice person, perfect for her team, but the other candidate had very specific client experience so it made more project sense to hire the other candidate. I understood, and I thanked her for personally following up with me. She told me she'd send me any other openings that might open up and encouraged me to keep applying at her company.

Good to her word, about six months ago she sent me a job posting and I applied, and received a standard rejection email from HR. Then, last week she sent me another email with a newly posted job and suggested I apply. I thanked her profusely and spent three hours carving out a thorough application. I mentioned the hiring manager who sent me the job postingUnder the "How did you hear about this position" section.

Today I received this email from the ignorant, arrogant HR person:

We received your application for [ABC job] at [XYZ, Inc.].

After reviewing your candidate file we discovered you were not selected for two previous positions at [XYZ, Inc.]. You will not be considered for the [ABC job]. This is your third strike. We have removed your candidate profile from our database. All future applications you submit to [XYZ, Inc.] will be similarly deleted. [XYZ, Inc.] feels you are not an appropriate fit for our company culture.


True, this wasn't a form rejection email, which is refreshing. When you spend significant time and thought on a job application it's nice to have a personal response. And I always appreciate candor and constructive advice. And I like that he didn't hide behind a generic signature, he took full responsibility for the rejection email by signing his name and three, count 'em three, lines of a job title. (Ever notice the correlation between age and job titles? The younger, more junior level the person, the longer and fluffier the job title.)

It's certainly the most blunt rejection letter I've received, so kudos there, too.  Message received, loud and clear. I'm not an [XYZ, Inc.] kind of person. If I were basing my opinion of [XYZ, Inc.] solely on the HR person, I would wholeheartedly agree that I am not an appropriate fit for their company culture.

However.

There is the matter of the woman who suggested I apply to the position. She is the polar opposite of the HR person. So I'm confused as to what [XYZ, Inc.]'s culture is. Is it the snide HR nitwit, or the pleasant, professional executive? Is she a lone wolf, a renegade who doesn't fit in at [XYZ, Inc.], or is the HR person an jerk wielding what little power he has over lowly job candidates who are no threat to him?

The executive is far senior to the HR guy.  If I were an angry, spiteful, sore loser I would forward the rejection email to her. But I'm not angry or spiteful. I'm the kind of person who routinely earned good sportsmanship awards and got extra civics points.

I could query her with my actual sentiment: Confusion. "Thank you for suggesting the [ABC position], I applied and was summarily rejected. Perhaps I was not the right fit for the position, and it seems HR feels that I am not the right fit for [XYZ, Inc.], either. I very much appreciate your efforts in suggesting job postings to me, but I am now confused as to whether or not I should proceed with any future openings."

Apart from the HR nitwit, I would very much like to work at this company so I don't want to burn any bridges or come off in any way unprofessional. Going over the head of an HR person with an overinflated sense of importance is never a good idea. I learned that lesson a long time ago. And the rejection email is very clear. There is no gray area nor room for interpretation.

Some will say, "Trill, you have nothing to lose. Forward the email to the nice executive who suggested you apply to the position. If take this HR ninny down in the process, so bet it. You're doing a lot of people at [XYZ, Inc.] a huge favor."

And I would agree with that point of view, but...coming off as a snarky backstabber is not the optimal image to cultivate when one is in desperate need of a job.

So. Another day, another job hunting farce. 


“Would it save you a lot of time if I just gave up and went mad now?”


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9:01 PM

 
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